Talking Music with My Mom

I have chosen to interview my mom for my blog. I chose her because I wanted to see her perspective on music since she grew up as a Jehovah's Witness and I know how that's affected her life. I'm going to do my blog in a dialogue set up because it's not quiet enough at my house for a video or voice recording. 

Alycia: So where did you grow up?

Mom: I guess North Hollywood and Fresno, California.

Alycia: What decade did you grow up in?

Mom: The 80's and 90's.

Alycia: What's your first memory of music?

Mom: I remember my parents dancing to old schools.

Alycia: What genre of music did you like or dislike?

Mom: I didn't care for rap because I was never allowed to listen to it so it just never appealed to me. It still doesn't appeal to me. I like R&B. I'm into some of the girl rappers now, but I don't live my life by what they let out their mouth.

Alycia: What role did music play in your family?  

Mom: Hmm I don't know. I think that as I was growing up my parents had recorded a video of us and  like they would have music on and that would be when we would-- everybody would be in there dancing. We would do little shows for our parents and play a song they liked. I remember being on one of my brother's shoulders and they had like a long trench coat over us and we'd sing. Just fun stuff and happy memories.

Alycia: Do remember any of the songs you guys would sing or was it something you made up? 

Mom: No. They were actual songs that your grandparents had. I don't necessarily remember them. I have more of the memories of what we were doing versus what the songs were because I was probably like 4 or 5 at the time. But I do remember them listening to The Isley Brothers and Kool & the Gang and stuff like that. And Marvin Gaye. 

Alycia: So were there any particular bands that you were drawn to?

Mom: I liked R&B so I listened to Aaliyah and Mya. And then I think all of a sudden the white boy bands became popular. Your aunt was into New Kids on the Block. And then for me, my white boy group was the Backstreet Boys. Not all of their music, but some of their music.

Alycia: So you were more into the Backstreet Boys than Nsync?

Mom: Yeah they came first. I can't say they led the way because of New Kids on the Block and that was the original group for your aunt's generation. But for my generation after my sister's, it was Backstreet Boys. I did like some of Nsync's stuff too when they came out. But even your Uncle Paul would listen to Backstreet Boys.

Alycia: So how did Nana and Papa react to the music that you guys liked?

Mom: Oh! Honestly a lot of times I had my music on low because if it was something like Aaliyah and she had a song with Treach and she was a rapper. During that time, that was when rappers would do quick little interludes in the songs. Your grandpa told me " I don't ever wanna hear you listening to that again." Even though it was like a little snippet and it wasn't like the whole song was not a rap song. I would try to break it down like it's not a rap song. There's just a rapper on it. But he said it was rap and don't listen to it. So he was fine as long as it wasn't rap and the language was okay. I didn't tend to listen to straight Tupac so that was the one time I did get it.

Alycia: Do you remember any controversial artists in the music of your time?

Mom: Madonna. She was always crossing the line.

Alycia: How so? 

Mom: Her provocative lyrics, her videos, and having Jesus in her video and I think he was black; I can't remember. I think it was Like a Prayer. She was just considered very raunchy and for awhile I don't think she was allowed to perform on shows.

Alycia: The only songs I can think of being raunchy for its time by Madonna is the one Like a Virgin?

Mom: Yeah that was her. But I just remember her always being controversial. I don't really remember many controversial black female artists. But Madonna was always seen as unclean. She was ahead of her time though.

Alycia: Yeah that's a good way to put it. Someone like Ariana Grande was scrutinized for her song God is a Woman and that also featured Madonna in the music video. So what do you think of the music that we hear today or the music you hear me listen to?

Mom: I mean it comes across to people like super raunchy but when you think about it now, the stuff we were listening to-- like your grandparents listened to Marvin Gay Let's Get it On. He wasn't talking about making dinner he was talking about let's get it ON. They just were more subtle or discrete; at that time they spoke in code. The older I am and listen to it and I'm like oh that's what you were talking about. You were being nasty. Whereas now I think people nowadays are more descriptive. People are more out about how they feel and they don't hide it. Sex was just more hush-hush and private and now its like well everyone does it and its nothing to be ashamed of. They're more vocal about it and says what it is whether you like it not. 

Alycia: Hmm more descriptive. So how would describe the music in a Jehovah's Witness hall.

Mom: We're taking it there?

Alycia Yesss!

Mom: Umm so when you watch the Tyler Perry movies, I feel like when they're singing you feel more passion, heart, and soul coming out in the music. I don't feel that when they sing in the hall. It's just looking in a book and singing a line and the next line and then the next line. It's very monotone. Like someone that's giving a speech that's supposed to excite you or make you sad, but we're not getting sharing that emotion. We're just singing something that's monotone, so I don't connect with it. I like to turn on something that will get you boppin'. The music isn't like a band; its like a disc playing music in the background and it has a stop and then we'll start singing again but then we'll stop again then start singing again. Nothing about it changes. Like the rhythm of the music doesn't touch you. 

Alycia: Okay so are there any genres of music that you're surprised you gravitate to?

Mom:  I think sometimes I'm surprised that I like to listen to Billie Eillish or Post Malone. I'm even surprised that I like stuff by Meg thee Stallion or Cardi b because I didn't grow up listening to rap. Rap feels like a new experience to me. I also heard a Kpop song and I was like oh alright! I don't know what it's called though. But it was Kpop! 

Alycia: So how do you find new music?

Mom: A lot of times I just let Pandora play whatever. I find that I still gravitate to my time of music. I mean I can groove out to the stuff you guys got, but the stuff that came out when I was younger, it just hits different. Like when Missy Elliot comes on, I remember how much I loved her when she came out. She was the first female rap artist that I listened to. She had that stuff that made you wanna dance to. I also liked Ashanti. I remember she had this one song I used sing to your brother, David and he would just be cheesin'. It was called Happy. That's a big memory for me. 

Alycia: I don't think I've heard that. Do you still listen to it? Or do you avoid it? 

Mom: I probably unknowingly avoid it.

Alycia: Yeah because I've never heard you listen to that song and I don't think I remember even hearing it. 

Mom: The last time I probably listened to it was when he was alive. I haven't listened to it since then but I used love that song back in the day. When it came on, I used to sing it to him and I'd be grooving with him and just cheesin'. It was our song. 

Alycia: Wow I didn't know that. 

Mom: If you listen to it you'll see why. You gotta listen to it. 

Alycia: Well I think that's all the questions I have for you. Thank you for answering.

Mom: You're welcome. 

I learned a lot about my mom with these questions. She's played a huge role in my life and she's the strongest person I know. At the end I didn't want to ask anymore questions because my mom lost a child to SIDS and I know how personal that is to her; I know it's extremely painful. Thank you reading my blog.